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Quite simply one of the best self-help books every written. It could be life changing for some people. I have read it twice and I know I will come back to it again.
People said to Eckhart Tolle: “I want what you have. Can you give it to me, or show me how to get it?” He replied “You have it already. You just can't feel it because your mind is making too much noise.”
Not to be able to stop thinking is a dreadful affliction.
When you have a thought come into your head, listen to it. Feel that there is a conscious presence - your deeper self - behind or underneath the thought. The thought then loses its power over you and quickly subsides.
When the thought subsides you experience a discontinuity in the mental stream - a gap of “no mind”. This is consciousness without thought. You feel a certain peace and stillness inside you. You will also feel a subtle emanation of joy arising from deep within : The joy of being.
Observing your emotions is as important as observing your thoughts.
Emotion literally means “disturbance”.
Love, joy and peace are deep states of Being rather than emotions.
“Love” may be pleasurable and exciting for a while, but it is an addictive clinging, an extremely needy condition that can turn into its opposite at the flick of a switch. Many “love” relationships after the initial euphoria has passed, actually oscillate between love and hate; attraction and attack.
The mind always seeks to deny the Now and to escape from it. You need to make your dwelling place in the Now, and pay brief visits to the past and future when required to deal with the practical aspects of your life situation.
The “pain-body” is a negative energy field that occupies your body and mind. It's all the pain you have collected in your life.
Focus attention on the feeling inside you - the pain. Stay present, and continue to be the observer of what is happening about you. Just OBSERVE it. Notice how it feels. Then become aware of not only the emotional pain, but also of the “one who observes”, the silent watcher. That's you as you are observing.
Fear comes in many forms :unease, worry, anxiety, nerves, tension, dread, phobia, etc. This kind of psychological fear is always of something that might happen, not of something that is happening Now.
Power over others is weakness disguised as strength. True power is within, and it is available to you Now.
The EGO:
The most common ego identifications are to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, personal and family history, belief systems, and often also political, nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications. NONE OF THESE IS YOU.
What you think of as the past is a memory trace, stored in the mind, of a former Now.
The essence of what I am saying here cannot be understood by the mind. The moment you grasp it, there is a shift in consciousness from mind to Being, from time to presence. Suddenly, everything feels alive, radiates energy, emanates Being.
Step out of the time dimension as much as possible in everyday life.
Whenever you are able to observe your mind, you are no longer trapped in it.
Learn to use time in the practical aspects of your life - we may call this ‘clock time’ - but immediately return to the present moment awareness when those practical matters have been dealt with.
Any lesson or mistake made and learned in the past is applied NOW. Any planning as well as working towards goals is done NOW.
If you dwell on past mistakes too much mentally, and use self-criticism, remorse or guilt then you are making an error.
Unease, ANXIETY, tension, stress, worry - all forms of fear - are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of non-forgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.
Narrow your life down to this moment. Your life situation may be full of problems - most are - but find out if you have any problem at this moment. Not tomorrow or in 10 minutes, but now. Do you have a problem now?
Use your senses fully. Be where you are. Look around. Just look, don't interpret. See the light, shapes, colours, textures. Be aware of the silent presence of each thing. Be aware of the space that allows everything to be. Listen to the sounds; don't judge them. Listen to the silence behind and between the sounds. Touch something - anything - and feel and acknowledge its Being. Observe the rhythm of your breathing; feel the air flowing in and out, feel the life energy inside your body. Allow everything to be, within and without. BE NOW.
All “problems” are situations that need to be dealt with or accepted. Why call it a problem? Why make anything into a problem? Isn't life hard enough? Problems are illusions of the mind! What do you need problems for?
If there is no joy in what you are doing, it does not mean you need to change what you are doing. You only need to change how you are doing it. Give more attention to the “doing”.
So do not be concerned with the fruit of your action - just give attention to the action itself. The fruit will come of its own accord.
You should try and live in the present. If you know that you are not in the present, that you are spending too much time in the past or future, that knowing is presence. Well done!
“Am I at ease at this moment?” is a good question to ask yourself frequently. What kind of thoughts are your mind producing? What do you feel? Direct your attention into the body. Is there any tension?
Humans are a dangerously insane and very sick species. That’s not a judgement. It’s a fact. And no civilization has ever produced so much ugliness as ours today.
To complain is always non-acceptance of what is. Leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.
If you have been stuck in an unhappy situation for a long time, then any action is better than no action. If it turns out to be a mistake, at least you learn something, in which case it is no longer a mistake.
Is there something you “should” be doing but are not? Get up and do it now. Otherwise completely accept your inactivity, laziness, or passivity at this moment, if that is your choice. Go into it fully. Enjoy it. Be as lazy as you can. Then there is no inner conflict, guilt, no resistance, no negativity.
Connecting with your inner body
Close your eyes for this practice. Direct your attention into the body. Feel it from within. Is it alive? Is there life in your hands, arms, legs, and feet - in your abdomen, your chest? Can you feel the subtle energy field that pervades your entire body and gives vibrant life to every organ and every cell? Can you feel it simultaneously in all parts of the body as a single field of energy? Do not start to think about it. FEEL IT.
Perhaps at the moment there is just a slight tingling in your hands and feet. That's good enough for the moment. Just focus on the feeling. Your body is becoming alive. We will practice some more later. Open your eyes again.
When challenges come in your day, as they always do, make it a habit to go within your body at once and focus as much as you can on the inner energy field of your body. This need not take long, just a few seconds. But you need to do it the moment that the challenge presents itself.
A self healing meditation when you feel an illness coming on:
Last thing at night when you are falling asleep and first thing in the morning in bed, “flood” your body with consciousness. Close your eyes. Lie flat on your back. Choose different parts of your body to focus your attention on briefly at first : hands, feet , arms, legs, abdomen, chest, head and so on. Feel the life energy inside those parts as intensely as you can. Stay with each part for 15 seconds or so. Then let your attention run through the body like a wave a few times, from feet to head and back again. This need only take a minute. After that, feel the inner body in its totality, as a single field of energy. Hold that feeling for a few minutes. Be intensely present during that time, present in every cell of your body. Don't be concerned if the mind occasionally succeeds in drawing your attention out of the body and lose yourself in some thought. As soon as you notice that this has happened, just return your attention to the inner body.
When meditating you can imagine yourself surrounded by a light or immersed in a luminous substance - a sea of consciousness. Then breathe in that light. Feel that luminous substance filling up your body and making it luminous also. Then gradually focus more on that feeling. You are now in your body. Don't get attached to any visual image.
Become aware of the entire inner energy field of the body. Don't think about it - FEEL IT.
Take yourself deep in that feeling. Become one and merge with it.
Stay in this realm of PURE BEING for as long as feels comfortable then become aware again of your physical body and senses and breathing and open your eyes. Look around you in a meditative way without labeling and continue feeling your inner body.
Feel the inner body even when engaged in everyday activities, especially when engaged in relationships or when you are relating with nature.
Look in a state of intense alertness, at a flower, so that there is no mental commentary running at the same time.
Do you hear a dog barking sometimes? A baby crying? A car? Look out for the silence in which the sounds come and into which they return.
Pay more attention to the silence than to the sounds.
Pay attention to silence all the time. Become conscious of the gaps between words, and intervals between sentences. You become still within.
Become aware of the space that is all around you. Don't think about it. Feel it, as it were. Pay attention to “nothing”.
There is nothing you can do or attain that will get you closer to salvation than it is at this moment. This may be hard to grasp for a mind accustomed to thinking that everything worthwhile is in the future.
Relationships:
Unless and until you access the consciousness frequence of presence, all relationships, and particularly intimate relationships, are deeply flawed and ultimately dysfunctional. They may seem perfect for a while, such as when you are “in love”, but invariably that apparent perfection gets disrupted as arguments, conflicts, dissatisfaction, and emotional or even physical violence occur with increasing frequency. It seems that most “love relationships” become love/hate relationships before long. Love can then turn into savage attack, feelings of hostility, or complete withdrawal of affection at the flick of a switch. This is considered normal. The relationship then oscillates for a while, a few months or a few years, between the polarities of “love” and hate, and gives you as much pleasure as it gives you pain. It is not uncommon for couples to become addicted to those cycles. Their drama makes them feel alive. When a balance between the positive/negative polarities is lost and the negative, destructive cycles occur with increasing frequency and intensity, which happen sooner or later, then it will not be long before the relationship finally collapses.
The negative side of a relationship is, of course, more easily recognizable as dysfunctional than the positive one. And it is also easier to recognize the source of negativity in your partner than to see it in yourself. It can manifest in many forms: possessiveness, jealousy, control, withdrawal and unspoken resentment, the need to be right, insensitivity and self-absorption, emotional demands and manipulation, the urge to argue, criticize, judge , blame or attack, anger, unconscious revenge for past pain inflicted by a person, rage and physical violence.
Was it love in the first place or just an addictive grasping and clinging?
You cannot love your partner one moment and attack him or her the next. True love has no opposite.
But there comes a point when your partner behaves in ways that fail to meet your needs, or rather those of your ego. At this point, the ego is still unconsciously hoping that its attack or its attempts at manipulation will be sufficient punishment to induce your partner to change their behaviour, so that it can use them again as a cover-up for your pain.
Every addiction starts with pain and ends with pain. Whatever the substance you are addicted to - alcohol, food, legal or illegal drugs, or a person - you are using something or somebody to cover up your pain. That is why, after the initial euphoria has passed, there is so much unhappiness.
They bring out the pain and unhappiness that is already in you. Every addiction does that.
Avoidance of relationships in an attempt to avoid pain is not the answer either. The pain is there anyway. Three failed relationships in as many years are more likely to force you into awakening than three years on a desert island or shut away in your room. But if you could bring intense presence into your loneliness, that would work for you too.
The moment that judgement stops and you ACCEPT WHAT IS, you can free your mind for love, joy and peace, the trinity of happiness. First you stop judging yourself, then you stop judging your partner. All mind games and all addictive clinging are then over. This is the end of codependency.
You will then either separate, or move deeply into the NOW together.
Millions are now living alone or as single parents, unable to establish an intimate relationship or unwilling to repeat the insane drama of past relationships. Others go from one relationship to another, from one pleasure-and-pain cycle to another (EXACTLY WHAT I AM DOING LOL!!!) in search of the elusive goal of fulfillment through union with the opposite energy polarity.
Still others compromise and continue to be together in a dysfunctional relationship in which negativity prevails, for the sake of children or security, through force of habit, fear of being alone, or some other mutually “beneficial” arrangement, or even through the unconscious addiction to the excitement of emotional drama and pain.
Whenever your relationship is not working, whenever it brings out the “madness” in you and in your partner, be glad. IT IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR SALVATION.
If there is anger, the urge to argue, the need to be right, or any emotional pain, KNOW the reality of that moment. The relationship then becomes your spiritual practice. If you observe unconscious behaviour in your partner, hold it in the loving embrace of knowing that you won't react.
As you will have noticed in your life: Relationships are not there to make you happy or fulfilled. If you continue to pursue the goal of salvation through a relationship, you will be disillusioned again and again. But if you accept that the relationship is here to make you conscious instead of happy, then the relationship WILL offer you salvation, and you will be aligning yourself with the higher consciousness that wants to be born into this world.
Do not create a time gap in which an unexpressed or unacknowledged emotion or grievance can fester and grow. Learn to give expression to what you feel without blaming. Learn to listen to your partner in an open, non-defensive way.
If your partner is still unconscious and unaware and not living in the Now, while you are becoming free, this will present a major challenge - not to you, but to your partner. It will not be easy for her to live with you. Her ego finds it extremely threatening. Remember that the ego needs problems and conflict, and you will no longer be supplying them! The need for argument, drama and conflict is not being met!
If they are not ready to join you in your state, you will separate like oil and water. The light is too painful for someone who wants to remain in the darkness.
When a loved one has just died, or you feel your own death approaching, you cannot be happy. It is impossible. But you can be at peace. There may be sadness and tears, but provided that you have relinquished resistance, underneath the sadness you will feel a deep serenity, a stillness, a sacred presence.
When you are fully conscious, nobody can have an argument with you! TRUE!
YOU MUST HAVE FAILED DEEPLY ON SOME LEVEL OR EXPERIENCED SOME DEEP LOSS OR PAIN TO BE DRAWN TO THE SPIRITUAL DIMENSION!
Everybody “fails” sooner or later and every achievement eventually comes to naught. All forms are impermanent.
What happens to you IS NOT YOUR LIFE, only your LIFE SITUATION.
Your physical energy is subject to cycles. There will be times of low as well as high energy. Just accept the low cycles. Allow them to be, knowing that they will pass.
Material things or entertainment of ANY form cannot give you identity or fulfillment - it is a recipe for suffering and frustration. The whole advertising and consumer society would collapse if people became enlightened and no longer sought to find their identity through things. The more you seek happiness in this way, the more it will elude you.
Those we realise this often become world-weary and depressed.
When you have “seen everything” - like me!
When you reach this point, you are one step away from despair - and one step away from enlightenment!
No other life force on the planet knows negativity - only humans! No other life form violates and poisons the Earth that sustains it. Have you ever seen an unhappy flower or a stressed oak tree? Have you ever come across a depressed dolphin, a frog that has a problem with self-esteem, a cat that cannot relax, or a bird that carries hatred and resentment? The only animals that may occasionally experience something akin to negativity or show signs of neurotic behaviour are those that live in close contact with humans and so link into the human mind and its insanity.
Watch any plant or animal and let it teach you acceptance of what is, surrender to the Now.
"I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them cats."
When you have reached a certain degree of presence you don't need negativity anymore to tell you what is needed in your life situation. But as long as negativity is there, use it. Use it as a signal that reminds you to be more present.
There are as yet few people ON THE PLANET who can sustain a state of continuous presence, although some are getting close to it. Soon, there will be more!
When you feel negativity arising within you, even the slightest irritation, you need to acknowledge it and look at it. Otherwise there will be a cumulative build-up of unobserved reactions.
In a traffic jam or hearing a car alarm, child screaming or dog barking : Allow the noise to pass right through you. It must no longer hit a solid “wall” inside you.
If somebody says something to you that is rude or designed to hurt. Instead of going into unconscious reaction and negativity, such as attack, defense, or withdrawal, you let it pass right through you.
You can still tell that person that his or her behaviour is unacceptable, if that is what you choose to do. But that person no longer has the power to control your inner state.
Your body is an incredible misperception of your true nature. But your true nature is concealed in that illusion, so the body is still the only point of access to it.
Surrender to the present moment. Do not confuse surrender with an attitude of “I cant be bothered anymore” or “I just don't care anymore”.
Q. What about people who want to control me? Should I surrender to them?
A. If you resist or fight unconscious behaviour in others, you become unconscious yourself. But surrender doesn't mean you allow yourself to be used. Not at all. It is perfectly possible to say “no” firmly and clearly to a person or to walk away from a situation and be in a state of complete inner nonresistance at the same time.
If you suddenly feel very light, clear and deeply at peace, that is an unmistakable sign that you have truly surrendered.
When you are have health problems, they are not the problem. You are the problem. Do not feel you have failed in some way, do not feel guilty. Do not blame life for treating you unfairly, but do not blame yourself either. All that is resistance. If you are ill, use it for enlightenment.
Anything “bad” that happens in your life - use it for enlightenment. Withdraw time from the illness. Do not give it any past or future. DO NOT GIVE THE ILLNESS A LIFE OF ITS OWN!
Whenever any kind of disaster strikes, or something goes seriously “wrong” - illness, disability, loss of home or money or of a socially defined identity, break-up of a close relationship, death or suffering of a loved one, or your own impending death - know that there is another side to it, that you are just one step away from something incredible : a complete alchemical transmutation of the base metal of suffering into gold.
That one step is called surrender.
Do not resist the pain. Allow it to be there. Surrender to the grief, despair, fear, loneliness, or whatever form the suffering takes. Witness it without labeling it mentally. Embrace it. Then see how the miracle of surrender transmutes deep suffering into deep peace.. THis is your crucifixion. Let it become your resurrection and surrender.
When there is no way out, there is still always a way through. So don't turn away from the pain. Face it. Feel it fully. Feel it - don't think about it!
Keep feeling the pain and be alert and present with your whole Being, with every cell of your body. As you do so, you are bringing a light into the darkness. This is the flame of your consciousness.
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