Tom Walsh's Quotations for Living Life Fully

“Sometimes we mistake patience for weakness, but the patient person often realizes that it's much more important for another person to discover his or her own gifts and shortcomings--the patient person doesn't feel a need to "fix" other people, and sometimes will let certain things slide until the other person recognizes the problems. Patient parents often let their kids make the same mistake two or three times because they know that a lesson learned oneself is almost always preferable to a lesson given to us by an authority figure like a parent.” ― Tom Walsh

“It's easy to get lost in our own heads. It's easy to allow the thoughts and worries and plans and hopes to take on their own lives and control our minds in such a way that we lose sight of all that's around us in any given moment. It's difficult to allow those thoughts and problems to take a back seat in our lives in order to be completely aware of what's right here, right now. Perhaps there's a person who really could use you to take a couple of moments to pay attention to him or her; perhaps there's a cool autumn breeze that's going to calm your spirit with its amazing touch--but only if you actually notice it.” ― Tom Walsh

“Life is not about control or making things happen in the ways we think they should happen. In fact, it's rather arrogant for us to be on this planet that's been here for so long and expect to be able to control life on it. If we want to see changes, then our task is to set things in motion, not to micromanage and make them happen in the ways we think they should. If we have something that is possessing us, such as alcohol or our television sets or our cell phones, then it could be time to let it go and move on with our lives. If we're holding on to resentment and anger, we're simply raising our own stress levels and blood pressure, but we're not contributing anything positive to the situation--and it's time to let it go.” ― Tom Walsh

“We lose our ability to live fully if we neglect or ignore our responsibility to the other people who share this planet with us. We simply cannot reach our full potential without the insights and observations that other people--our teachers--have to give us. We cannot feel whole until we are helping other people to reach for their potential and to grow as strong as they can grow. We do need down time, and we do need time to ourselves, but we very much need to acknowledge our ties to our fellow human beings and act as if those people meant more to us than our jobs or pets or cars do. They are much more important than anything material that we ever can get our hands on or strive for.” ― Tom Walsh

“I started to discover the meaning of happiness when I started to discover--and practice--the art of acceptance. When I started to accept life for what it was and I started to accept whatever situation I was in as the way things were, I started to see that my happiness depended on my own attitude. When I started focusing on getting the most out of my life the way it was rather than trying to turn it into what I thought it should be, I started to realize that I was, indeed, becoming a much happier person.” ― Tom Walsh

“We were all made with the potential to be the people we are supposed to be. We all have souls and we all have minds and we all have wills. Many people look at the world and see a beautiful place full of potential and love and beauty those are the people you want as friends. But many people look at the world and see a place that hurts, that causes pain, that destroys and corrupts. Those are the people you don't want to have as friends, for those are the people who will pull you down with them, who will fill your mind with similar thoughts, who will turn you from a positive person to a negative person. God made us all with the potential to be positive people, contributing to the growth of this world, but many people choose to be negative, diminishing the light of those who wish to do good.' 'Why?' Walker asked. 'Because, my friend, it's easier. It's unfortunate, but it's true. It's much easier for a person to think that the world will not let him advance, because then that person won't have many expectations of himself, and it's easier to fulfil low expectations.” ― Tom Walsh

“Education is a choice. We don't become educated by watching television, and we don't learn a whole lot having similar conversations with the same, safe people day after day. Our education comes from pushing up against boundaries, from taking risks that may seem at first to be overwhelming, and by persevering past the first disappointments or shortfalls until we reach a point at which actual learning takes place. Determination and perseverance are absolutely vital to developing a true education--rarely, if ever, do we learn the most valuable lessons in the first few steps of the journey.” ― Tom Walsh

“Unfortunately, we don't have all that many good examples to follow. The people that our cultures label as "successful" are the ones who have become wealthy or famous or celebrities, but the truly successful people--those who have become happy and who are living happy, loving, giving lives--aren't often featured in our newspapers or newscasts. We see the politicians and the criminals and the athletes and the entertainment "stars," but we don't see the people who can truly inspire us to be happy by being just who we are.” ― Tom Walsh

“When we separate ourselves from the rest of the world, the world becomes a lonely and difficult place to live in. When we see ourselves as completely separate, we cannot call upon the power and strength that comes from unity, from being part of a greater whole. In today's world, we buy into the lie that if we do see ourselves as--or make ourselves into--a part of the greater whole, then we'll lose our identity and become nothing more than another face in the crowd, a lemming who does nothing but follow others and never creates his or her own life. Nothing, though, could be further from the truth.” ― Tom Walsh

“Our culture values independence and isolation far too much, it seems to me--we have a hard time making ourselves part of things, of making ourselves responsible to others, and trusting others to be there for us. Sure, there's pain involved if we get hurt, but there's far more pain in isolation. I love community because God gave us other people to live with, not to pull away from, and I learn so much from others that I can't imagine my life without the learning I've gained from getting to know other people.” ― Tom Walsh

“Saying a prayer can be as simple as thinking positive thoughts about someone—it’s not an act that needs to be tied to any particular religion or system of beliefs. I can say a prayer just by saying “I wish you peace” after someone becomes angry with me for something trivial; I can say a prayer for the woman who is always cheerful (or gloomy) at the store where I shop by thinking “I wish you all the best in life—good health, good relationships, and all of your true needs fulfilled.” Of course, if you want to pray to God in the form in which you conceive of God, that’s fine, too—and your prayer will not be wasted. Think about it. Is the world a better place when you walk away from someone either forgetting them immediately or thinking negative thoughts about them? This world of ours can use all the positive thoughts we can contribute to it, and our simple and heartfelt prayers are some of the most positive thoughts we can create and share. And they affect us as much as, if not more than, they affect the objects of our prayers.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“This need to be right has put a huge burden on me, one that I never deserved to have to carry. Part of it, I know, is cultural--in this age of information at a moment's notice, we've come to expect people to have answers--the right answers--at the drop of a hat. I feel very fortunate that over the last decade or so I've been able to leave the need to be right behind me and move on with my life with a more healthy perspective. I'm now willing not just to admit that I'm wrong, but also to stick my neck out with ideas or thoughts that may be wrong. The possibility of being wrong no longer threatens my emotional well-being; if I'm wrong, I'm wrong, and I learn from that.” ― Tom Walsh

“The world is in sore need of good listeners. And in our own lives, it’s amazing to recognize just how valuable listening can be for us. How many mistakes have you made because you didn’t listen well? Personally, I’ve made many—and I’ve missed out on some wonderful opportunities because I was more interested in sharing what I had to say than I was in listening to what someone else had to say.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“It seems that many of us have the goal of making other people conform to our desires and expectations, whether or not we would admit to such a thing. We see this especially in parents who get upset because their children don’t conform to their expectations, but instead follow a pattern of development that is unique and individual. We often use language with peers and colleagues that encourages them to change their ways of doing things to our ways of doing things: “You should” and “You ought to” are usually presented as advice, but in the end they really are about changing someone else’s ways of doing things. And we may offer this “advice” in a spirit of love and helpfulness, but we can be much more helpful when we help them to find their own ways of changing things. It can be incredibly freeing to spend an entire day not looking to try to change the behaviors, beliefs, or attitudes of other human beings. If we approach life in this way, we may learn much about the other people in our lives instead of trying to make them be like us.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“The simple truth is that love is a part of who we are, not something that others "give" to us if we're worthy of it. We're taught that if we just find that right person, and that person "falls in love" with us, everything will be fine. We're not taught about recognizing the love that is a part of our spirits, the love that we radiate when we recognize the beauty and need in all the people that surround us. Love is ours to share, at all moments and in all situations, but for some reason we fear doing so.” ― Tom Walsh

“So it's important to remember that our job isn't to solve other people's problems for them, but to help them to discover the ways that are most effective and most practical for them to deal with their own problems. We can't wave a magic wand or open a self-help book to a certain page and say, "There--you're no longer an alcoholic," but we can listen to them and talk to them and help them to find ways to deal with the issues that are driving them to use alcohol. And when they're facing the hardest times in dealing with the problems, we can be there as someone to lean on when they need to lean.” ― Tom Walsh

“Walker and Timothy sat quietly for a very long time. “Why do so many people make it so hard for anyone to help them or to love them?” Walker asked finally. Timothy chuckled. “Ah, Walker—if I could explain all of humanity’s foibles, I’d be a rich man indeed, at least as far as money goes. I believe people are like that because of fear. They fear being loved because they fear that if they’re loved, they’ll have to love back. And if they love back, they may get hurt. And many people aren’t ready to put their hearts on the line like that. Mostly because they don’t have anything to fall back on. It’s quite a shame, really, because they hurt themselves by trying to avoid getting hurt. But we have to be willing to die many times if we’re ever going to get on with this business of living.” ― Tom Walsh

“Look at it this way—before any of this wood became parts of the shelves or the desk or the chair, all of it was in pieces—just pieces of wood. But the wood was full of potential. It could be shaped into anything that a carpenter wanted it to be shaped into, turning it into a beautiful finished product. Now, not all carpenters are equal in skill—you know that. If a piece of wood is shaped by a poor carpenter, the finished product will be lacking somehow, in some way. "But if that wood is shaped by a master carpenter, then that piece will fit into this world precisely as it’s supposed to fit, whether it be a desktop or a cabinet shelf or a doorstop. And the way that I work wood is the way I try to work with people—with love and attention and caring—so that the wood and the people can reach their potential. And if someone lets you teach them, and is open to what you have to teach, then how can you go wrong?” ― Tom Walsh

“Some people search out solitude without even thinking that they need to do so--it's an innate urge with them, something that they do as a matter of course, without even thinking about the psychological benefits of being alone. These people are very fortunate, for they help themselves in a very important way on a regular basis. Other people are given solitude involuntarily--with me it came from my insecurities and my inability to fit in with others. For me, solitude was very often loneliness, and very often painful. But I know now that I made it painful because of my perspective, and I regret losing so many opportunities that being on my own opened up to me--I'll never be able to get them back. Find or make time for yourself to be with yourself. Spend time thinking about who you are and who you want to be. Examine your strengths and focus on possibilities. Find the friend inside who has accomplished a lot, and learn to love yourself on your own terms. If you can do this, you've taken a very important step towards being able to help others to learn about themselves and to be more content with life.” ― Tom Walsh

“Just for today, I'll focus on the people I'm with. . . . In this day and age, it’s astonishing to see how many people feel that it’s not rude to ignore the people they’re with while they talk on their phones to other people who aren’t even there. When we start focusing on someone who isn’t with us, we send a message to the people who are with us that they aren’t as important as those other people, and that what I have to talk about with this person on the phone is much more important than what I have to talk over with you. Most of us can’t remember what it’s like to give our undivided attention to someone else—or to have someone else give his or her undivided attention to us. Some of us never have experienced this at all, and that’s quite a shame, for it’s one of the most important ways to develop relationships that we have. Just for today, let’s turn off the cell phone when we’re with friends, and live in the moment with the people who are with us. We can catch up with the others later (as we used to do with no problems).” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Our very first problem is to accept our present circumstances as they are, ourselves as we are, and the people about us as they are. ” ― Tom Walsh, Quotations for Living Life Fully

“Today, I am glad that I’m me—I’m glad that I was born who I am, that I’ve learned what I’ve learned, and that I’ve become who I am. I am happy and grateful for my life, and I shall not waste time comparing it with the lives of others, for I am I, and I am very glad of that fact!” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“We must trust that what we're doing has a purpose. We must realize that we're not here to make kids conform or perform, but that we're here to help them to develop their own unique skills and talents, not the ones we want them to have or the ones we think they should have.” ― Tom Walsh

“One must learn by doing the thing; though you think you know it, you have no certainty until you try. -Sophocles” ― Tom Walsh, Quotations for Living Life Fully

“The world never lacks beauty. We sometimes lack the awareness necessary to notice and appreciate it.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“We often spend tons of time trying to get people to believe the things that we believe, because we think it will be better for them. We try to convince others that our religious or political views have more validity than theirs do, for we think that we’re doing them a favour by steering them in the right direction. But each of us has our own unique way of looking at this world of ours, and it’s important that we accept and respect the fact that someone who has a different brain than we have and a different background than we have just may see the world in different ways than we do. One of the most beautiful results of this type of realization is seeing just how much we can learn from each other and grow together when we stop trying to make someone else believe our truths. When all the time that we have spent trying to convince someone they’re wrong is spent instead on getting to know that person better and letting them get to know us better, we can truly develop a stronger and deeper relationship.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Thinking ahead often seems to be a lost art. Many people are so caught up in instant gratification that they never stop to think about the long-term effects of some of their actions. They also don’t see the connections between today’s actions and tomorrow’s results—and this causes an awful lot of pain and frustration in life. Whatever I do today, I should be aware of the possible effects—negative and positive—that can show up in the future, near or far. Of course, we can’t let the fear of what might happen in the future keep us from acting today. But we can make our lives much easier if we just remember the law of cause and effect, and realize that some of what we do today will be the cause of effects that won’t show up until later.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“If I'm to have a character that others admire, I need to focus on developing that character. I need to make decisions that are honourable and honest. I need to focus on others rather than myself. I need to be consistent in my dealings with other (while being careful to avoid what Emerson called "a foolish consistency"). I must obey the calls of my religious beliefs. And I must be true to myself, my God, and others. I should never seek the admiration of others, but if I develop an honest, loving, caring character, the admiration will come.” ― Tom Walsh

“Am I corrupted if I believe that the people who think alike are more admirable and estimable than those who think for themselves? If no one thought differently, then where would our innovations come from? How would we ever advance beyond the status quo? Corruption isn't just moral or ethical in nature--rust is a form of corruption, one that eats away at its host like a parasite, constantly making it less than it was the day before. The belief that they should hold in greater esteem those who think alike is a form of rust, something that doesn't allow our young people to grow beyond the limitations already established by those who do think alike.” ― Tom Walsh

“What do we do when things just don’t seem to be going the ways that we think they should, the ways that we want them to, the ways that we try to make them go? It’s very frustrating sometimes to feel that the world is doing its own thing without considering our needs and wants—but sometimes, when we trust life, we start to see that our “failures” are simply life’s way of pushing us in new and exciting directions—not always gently, of course, but pushing us nonetheless. The problem arises when we start to feel the need to know just what this larger plan is. That’s not necessarily for us to know, though—sometimes it’s important just to trust, to let go of the need to try to control outcomes, and start to look for the hints that will tell us how to contribute to the world in the ways that come to us most naturally, the ways in which we’re the most strongly gifted.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“It’s important to distinguish between needs and wants. Sometimes we spend so much time chasing after our wants that we neglect our true needs, and that’s a course of action that over time is bound to harm us. Today it’s important to determine what exactly our needs are, and then attend to them so that we can make sure that we’re not going to burn out or hit a wall because we haven’t taken care of ourselves. Wants are important, too, but it’s obvious that in the long term, our needs should take priority. And when we identify a need, it’s important that we don’t brush it off without taking care of it, and today I’ll have chances to at least work on making sure that some important needs of mine are met.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“There’s an elegance to simplicity. Keeping things simple allows us to enjoy things more fully, without raising our expectations to unrealistic levels. Very often the most important thing that we can do in our lives is to keep things simple, yet we tend to complicate our lives and situations—often with the best of intentions—adding stress and work and many more details to our lives. Keeping things simple can certainly be a liberating force in our lives, and it can also help us to see the beauty of simplicity, and to learn its value.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“How we like to hold on! Sometimes we’re unwilling to let things go just because we know them, and they feel “safe” to us, even if we’re talking about something like behaviours that harm us, like defensiveness or addictions. We hesitate to let go because doing so will expose us to the unknown in our own lives, and we’ll have to deal with life without this part of ourselves that we’ve grown so accustomed to. But if we’re ever to move on to the next thing in life, if we’re to grow and develop as people, we may have to let go of things that are holding us back—behaviours and beliefs and sometimes even people. There is no formula that can tell us what we should let go of and what we should hold on to. But if we listen to our hearts, we can know what still serves us well, and what is keeping us from moving on and becoming better people.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Hurry is a thief, pure and simple. And sometimes when we complain about the absence of certain things in our lives, we really aren’t missing those things at all—rather, we just don’t notice them when they’re there because we fly right by them on our way to something else.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“How much time do we spend searching for happiness, hoping to find it in the new relationship or the new car or the new friendship or the new cell phone that has everything I’d ever want in a cell phone? Yet when these things come into our lives, we feel a sense of gratification for a while, but no real happiness. Person after person in history tells us that happiness is indeed an inside job, something that comes as a result of our attitudes and our perspective—not something that causes them to change to something better. The new boyfriend or girlfriend isn’t going to make us happy, for the happiness we feel can come only from ourselves. Our cultures tell us differently sometimes, but that’s usually because someone has something to sell us, and if they can promise us happiness through what they sell, we’ll be more likely to buy. (Use our toothpaste and you’ll get a new girlfriend, and then you’ll be happy!) Life doesn’t work that way, though advertisers want to convince us that it does. Trust that happiness will come only as a result of our own attitude shifts, and then we’ll see the importance of learning all we can about happiness so that we can make that shift in our minds and hearts, and become happy and healthy human beings when we do so.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“It is well said that we’re just borrowing this planet from our children—and what kind of condition are we going to return it in when we pass on?” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“But no matter how life looks at the moment, if we trust that it looks this way for a reason that will help us and others in the future, we can deal with this moment with a much stronger sense of purpose and acceptance.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Just for today, I'll do something nice for someone who's not expecting it. .” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Just for today, I'll remember that kind words accomplish much more than harsh words. .” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Resentment causes us to stay in the past, our minds focused on the wrongs that have been done to us. It really is time to let go of it just as we would let go of something that’s too hot and that would burn us if we held on to it too long. If we hold on to resentment even slightly too long, we’re risking great injury—emotional and spiritual—not just to ourselves, but to those we resent, too. So let’s let it go. Just for today.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Just for today, I'll hold on to my dreams and respect them. .” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“We’re making a choice every single time we put something into our mouths. And it’s a much more important choice than most people make it out to be. Today, make the choices that are positive ones for your body—and if you stay in the habit of doing so, you’ll find that you benefit greatly from those choices.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Just for today, I'll allow many things to be out of my control. . . . This can be very difficult for many of us. When someone tells us about something bad going on, we tend to want to solve the problem, to exercise some level of control over it. If someone is misbehaving, we often feel obligated to make that person change his or her behaviour. But many, many things in this life are not under our control, nor should they be—and we shouldn’t try to exert our influence trying to control them. Sometimes we need to accept that this is someone else’s problem, and that person is able to deal with it, or that this is an issue that’s going to take some time to resolve, or that this really, truly is none of my business. There are plenty of things in life that go on quite well without our involvement, and when we try to push ourselves in, we can add stress to our own lives and complicate the situations. So today, I’m going to let some things go, for they aren’t my affair.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Just for today, I'll try to maintain a positive perspective, no matter what the situation. . .” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Our culture doesn't seem to value competence as much as it used to. Now we seem to want to do and get everything as quickly as possible, which often leads to mediocre work and products. It seems to be the exception to find people at stores and businesses who are actually able to help us thoroughly with whatever problems we may have. We accept poor service and poor workmanship as if we deserve it--and when we decide to make a stand about something, it usually has to do with price or rudeness, but not about competence.” ― Tom Walsh

“It seems that the more we learn about our work, the easier and the more interesting it becomes to us. Tasks that used to be tedious now make sense, and we see how they're related to other elements of our jobs. Plus, they're easier to take care of now, so they don't bother us nearly as much when we need to do them. When we know more about our work and its ramifications, we can see the connections between what we do and the effects that those things have on other people.” ― Tom Walsh

“Let’s not judge others for chances that they’ve not had—in fact, let’s not judge them at all. Let’s accept them right now for who they are” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“Some of us waste a lot of time waiting for teachers to come along, telling ourselves that we can’t learn anything important on our own. But learning is something that we easily can do on our own—sometimes we just get caught up in thinking that we have to learn everything about a topic or it’s not worth our while, but when we approach our learning with patience, we’re able to see that learning a little today and a little tomorrow and a little next week eventually will lead to us knowing a great deal. And today I can start that process with something small, simple, and important.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition

“When someone does something that hurts us, it’s easy for us to think that if we forgive that person, we’re doing so for his or her sake. The truth is, though, that we ourselves benefit the most from our forgiveness. That forgiveness can rid us of the poisons of anger and resentment, two emotions that hold us prisoner and keep us from moving on with our lives in happy and fulfilling ways. When we carry a grudge, we’re really carrying around a weapon that we’re using against ourselves. Our negative feelings rarely affect the other person all that much, but they keep us in a deep dark hole that keeps us from seeing the sunshine and feeling the fresh air. Do yourself a favour: forgive. As Morrie Schwartz said shortly before his death, “Forgive everyone everything” before it’s too late to do so. Your life will take a turn for the better when you can truly forgive anyone who has done you wrong.” ― Tom Walsh, Just for Today, The Expanded Edition